Typical Morning

5:06 a.m.
Holden: “I have to pee!”
Kevin gets up, takes Holden to the bathroom, then back to bed. He returns to bed with a thump, just as Riley starts snuffling around.
Riley: “Eeeey!”
Riley quiets down, we all seemingly go back to sleep.

5:43 a.m.
Riley: “Eeeey!”
In quick succession, the sound of stuffed animals hitting the floor comes from Riley's room.
Riley: “Crash! Crash!”
This continues for 18 minutes.

6:00 a.m.
Holden: “Daddy! I see number six!”
With a grunt, Kevin gets out of bed, gathers Holden and his posse (Hippo, Dino, Doggie and Blanket), and carts them to the living room couch. He turns on the light and the television.
Riley: “Eeeey!”
Kevin puts a TiVo'd Backyardigans on for Holden, gets him some milk, heads to the shower.
Curled up in bed with the cats, Denise wonders how long she can stand Riley's noise. She thinks of a day, any day, where she can sleep past sunrise. No longer able to take Riley's wails, she heads to his room, securing her hair in a haphazard bun along the way.

6:11 a.m.
Denise plucks Riley out of the crib, cuddles him for a minute, lets him choose a book, puts him on the changing table where he turns on the overhead light before agreeing to lay down for a diaper change.
Denise: “Powder?”
Riley: “Powda.”

6:15 a.m.
Riley and Denise go in the bathroom where Kevin is showering. Riley, wearing pants and his pajama top to catch the drool and breakfast bits, climbs on the stool, where he will brush his teeth at the counter for about 20 minutes.

6:35 a.m.
As Denise is exiting the shower, Holden comes in the bathroom, where his toothbrush awaits. After being asked three times to brush his teeth, Holden climbs the stool, makes faces at himself in the mirror, then brushes his teeth.

6:40 a.m.
Holden is given five minutes to get his pajamas off and his clothes on. If he doesn't, he doesn't get to watch a second Backyardigans during breakfast.
Riley runs between his room and Holden's, holding cars. In his room, he tips over his cool mist humidifier and dumps out a bag of about 110 blocks.
Kevin is finishing getting dressed, Denise is cutting a banana, microwaving pancakes, spooning applesauce and pouring milk.

6:45 a.m.
The kids are in their booster seats, eating, watching television.
Kevin: “Bye, love you.” Rounds of kisses follow.
Holden: “Bye Daddy. I'm gonna have a good day today.”
Riley: “Iiiye!” Blows kisses and wiggles his fingers in a wave.

6:48 a.m.
Holden: “I need more pancakes.”
Half-dressed, Denise treks from the bathroom to the kitchen. Makes more pancakes.

6:51 a.m.
Riley: “Uh-oh!”
Denise leaves the bathroom with mascara on one eye, picks up Riley's sippy cup, returns to apply mascara to the other eye.

6:52 a.m.
Holden: “Can I have more applesauce?”
Denise puts down the mascara, goes to the kitchen, spoons out applesauce.

6:56 a.m.
Riley: “Mo! Mo!”
Denise puts down the hair dryer, goes to the kitchen, pulls out the Kashi Heart-to-Heart cereal, pours it on Riley's plate.

7:02 a.m.
Holden: “Can I have some Kashi, too?”
With one earring on, Denise leaves the bathroom, gets the cereal, pours some on Holden's plate. She notices his applesauce refill remains untouched.

7:08 a.m.
Holden: “I'm done.”
As he pushes back from the table, Riley pulls of his bib.
Denise goes to Riley's side, and spends the next two to three minutes trying to ascertain from Riley, who is alternately throwing himself away from her hands, pushing away the plate and crying, whether Riley is really done.
Deciding enough is enough and he won't starve, Denise wipes Riley's hands and face, takes off his pajamas top, hands it to him, lifts him down from the booster seat.
Riley, half-naked, heads toward his room to put the shirt in the hamper.
Denise: “Holden, put your shoes on.”
Riley puts his pajama top in the hamper, Denise pulls a clean shirt over his head, he toddles back to the living room.

7:11 a.m.
Denise: “Holden, put your shoes on.”
Denise gathers hers and Riley's shoes, brings them to the living room. Clears breakfast dishes and begins fashioning breakfast, lunch and snacks to bring to work.

7:16 a.m.
Denise: “Holden, put your shoes on. Please.”
Denise pulls Riley, writhing to get away, on to her lap.
Riley: “Sh! Sh!”
Denise: “Yes, Riley, shoes and socks.”
Riley's shoes and socks are on. He goes to toy bin, proceeds to dump every toy out.
Denise puts on her shoes, then slathers some nice, scented lotion on her hands.
Holden: “I gotta poop!”
Holden poops. Denise uses her newly lotioned hands to wipe his butt, then washes off all the lotion.
Denise glances at the clock, realizes there's no time to bother again with the lotion.
Holden washes his hands, goes in the living room, picks up a toy car and races it around the living room.

7:23 a.m.
Denise: “HOLDEN! PUT! YOUR! SHOES! ON! NOW!”
Holden: “I caaaaaaaaaaan't. I need heeeeeeeelp.”
Holden cries.
Denise spends the next three to four minutes wondering why he's crying before, in exasperation, picks up Holden's shoes, loosens the laces, shoves them on his feet and ties them.

7:28 a.m.
Denise: “OK. Jackets.”
Riley runs through the kitchen to the far wall.
Holden: “I want the soft brown one.”
Denise: “It's dirty. Wear this one.”
Holden: “Nooooooo!”
Denise runs off to find Riley, wrestles his jacket on him, then runs ahead of him to keep him from opening the front door.
Riley: “Iiiye, Iiiye!”
Holden: “I need heeeeeelp!”
Denise slams Holden's blue sweatshirt over his head. Riley returns to the living room to join Holden in deciding which toy to take into the car. The second toy bin is overturned and emptied to the floor. Riley picks up a car.
Holden: “I want THAT car!”
Denise: “Just pick something else.”
Holden picks an airplane. Riley drops his toy car and grabs at the airplane.

7:33 a.m.
Denise grabs her lunch box, work bag, computer bag and usually one or more of the following: kids' lunch box, bag of clothes for dry cleaners, Target bag to make a return on her lunch break. She puts everything on the front porch, closes door, picks up Riley, sets alarm.
Alarm: “Armed. Away. Exit Now.”
Holden opens the door and goes running out, yelling.
Denise: “Shhhh! People are sleeping!”
As Riley arches his back, Denise shoves his stomach into the car seat, straps him in.
Denise goes around car and open's Holden's door.
Denise: “Please get into the car.”
Holden flies his airplane around.
Denise: “Get in the car, Holden!”
Holden, standing still on the ground: “I aaaaaam!”

7:35 a.m.
Holden is secured in his carseat, Denise hauls all the stuff off the porch into the car.

7:38 a.m.
Only eight minutes behind schedule, Denise closes the door with a relieved sigh. She plugs the iPhone into the car stereo, but barely hears it as the conversation continues to flow from the back seat.
Holden: “In my city, where I work, there is a boy there. But I don't remember his name. And when I'm Batman I'll chase the bad guys....”
Riley: “Bu! Bu! Bu! Bu!”

7:54 a.m.
Arrive at daycare. The kids go running toward the front door to their waiting friends.
Lots of hugs and kisses.
Denise: “Holden, have fun today, be a good listener and please remember to slow down.”
Riley: “Iiiye!”
Denise gets back in the car, heads to 7-Eleven for a well-deserved and much-needed cup of coffee, and goes to work. A little weary, a little exhausted, but satisfied to have survived another morning.