Riley: 9 Years

Not to get all cliche on you, but, seriously, what a difference a year makes. Somewhere in the past year, Riley made that transition from Little Kid to Big Kid. It was quiet and slow, but it happened. Gone are the meltdowns and impasses that marred our days. Plain and simple, Riley pretty much just "gets it" now.

This is illustrated by his receiving the Good Citizen of the Year Award on the last day of school. His teacher, Ms. Sharp, always had such lovely things to say about Ra. He may have his struggles with writing and concentration and impulsiveness, but he tried so hard to just be good and do the best he could - which is pretty darn good based on his last report card. This is amazing for a kid who started the year with a suspension for some behavior that came about on a day he didn't get his medicine.

He had fun in soccer and transitioned back to jiu jitsu, where you could see he was more grown up. He had much more focus this year and really tried. He's on a break for summer and will start soccer again in the fall, and it will be interesting to see how he does bumped up to the U10 level, where kids (and their parents) really start to take the game quite seriously.

He is inquisitive about the world, space and all things science. There are so many questions - some have answers that I don't know, and some are just unanswerable mysteries of the universe. It's amazing to see how his brain works and churns through the information he receives, and generates even more questions and interesting reactions.

I think he's at the point where he is more aware of the universe and his place in it. Where he once loved dancing on stage with Music 'n Motion, he now says it's embarrassing to perform in front of other people. Last week was "superhero day" at day camp and, after picking out a mask and cape to wear, tried to ditch it in the car at the last minute - afraid he would be embarrassed because he'd be the only one who dressed up. He refused to ride his bike for months, only to admit it was because he thought his fire engine helmet was too "babyish." He gets very uncomfortable when he thinks he's being watched. It does make me a little sad that he can't let lose without abandon and just feel free to be his silly and entertaining self.

Because who he is is really quite awesome. He has the most sensitive, loving soul and does his best to be kind. He's that kid at camp who all the counselors love because he lavishes them with affection and hugs. I had some of those kids when I was a camp counselor and I know how great it was to have them around - how they can make you and the experience feel extra special. I loved how his counselors gushed over him when we picked him up from five nights of sleep-away camp last weekend.

Riley doesn't have a big group of buddies or a lot of friends, but he knows and is friendly with everyone, and has a couple whom he cares about so deeply, it's amazing. When he loves, he loves big. And he's had to work so hard to make sure that the love and affection he shows is appropriate and welcomed, which can be hard to do when you're a big mix of impulsive and affectionate.

My favorite time of day still remains bedtime reading and cuddles with Ra. He goes from amped to exhausted in the blink of an eye, so I'm back to reading to him at night. But I know how important that reading time is and I enjoy sharing stories with him. But, more so, I enjoy the feeling of his sweet breath  on my neck as he falls asleep on my shoulder. He is still and cuddly and opens his eyes with so much effort when I unwind out of his embrace to tell me "Good night, I love you, have sweet, sweet dreams."

Dear Ra-Ra,

Your dad and I could not be more proud of you and how hard you've worked this year to become more easy going, positive and successful - especially in school. You are becoming such a bright, charismatic and happy young man. Your smile is silly, but infectious. Your hugs are big. Your heart is huge. You have become brave and adventurous in so many ways - from rock climbing and repelling to trying new foods to riding your bike with such confidence around town. And you are so helpful - getting real joy and pride in pitching in wherever you can.
This morning, the day before you're 9th birthday, it was just you and I on a bike ride and I couldn't help but marvel how you led us through the streets you've come to own. I sometimes struggled to keep up and watched as you confidently looked left before turning right and rode over bumps and holes you used to ride around so carefully. I knew you had it in you, and it's so wonderful to see how you believe in yourself now, too.

I know it's so hard for you sometimes when you feel like you lack the concentration, attention and patience to get things done. But you work so hard at it and you keep getting better and better at everything you do. Thank you for all the trying. The succeeding is amazing. I'm so happy with who you are, and excited to watch what you'll become.

Love,
Mama